|
| i just thought i'd let everyone know that my blog has moved. i'm only keeping this one so i can read yours and make comments. my new blog is http://elmundodejason.blogspot.com. stop by sometime. it's fun.
| | |
| A few pictures to commemorate the summer:
Nevermind...I can't seem to get them to work.
http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/indierockerjason/my_photos
Just go here. Take a look. They're fun.
| | |
| so nothing too exciting in the world of jason. i just figured i'd
write some stuff down for the sake of writing it down. i realized
the other day that any way you slice it (graduating this year or next)
my life is on track for a big change, and there's nothing i can do
about it. things will change. friends will get
married. people move away. some friendships
disappear. unfortunately sometimes the inevitabilities of life
aren't much fun to deal with. but i guess the two things that
keep me going are that while everything is changing God will remain
unchanged, and that change = adventure. i've been getting bored
with things as they stand as of late anyways...so change will be
exciting. now if i only knew just what that change was...
| | |
| bleah...i just studied for an abstract algebra test for 3 hours.
hope i understand it all. the test is at 8 am tomorrow. 
| | |
| Guess who's back. Dang it's been a long time, but i just felt
like putting some thoughts and revelations in here. well, to
kinda start things off, i feel like maybe someone else can say things
better than i can. recently i discovered this Christian poet,
Bradley Hathaway. I'd encourage you to check him out, he writes
really good stuff. anyways...here's a poem by him.
Another One of Those Nights by Bradley Hathaway
So weary, and leery, and dreary! I feel.
Stop this mind from racing all the time.
Restful peace come hither. Be mine.
It was here earlier but now it's long gone and out of sight
On this restless, sleepless, clogged-up left nostril night.
I remember sleep
And what a comfort it once was
But now all it does is leave me lacking
Because even there these thoughts just won't stop yacking.
So I hit the floor and on bruised knees start banging down your door.
Can't take this anymore.
Holy Spirit manifest your being.
Comfort this soul so that I can start singing
Of that peaceful feeling that any minute now you'll be bringing.
Grace grows in winter, I am told.
(But that's not what I want to hear right now, truth be known.)
It's you Father that I desire
So put out this unholy fire
And set ablaze me anew with a peace that comes only from you.
Where else can I turn and what else may I do?
Here I am
Yours.
Here I am
Yours.
Here I am...
Yours.
That right there pretty much sums up my summer. I did a lot of
thinking over the summer, a lot of reconnecting with God, and a lot of
time just sitting and listening. (quick aside, i did become a bit
of a recluse this summer while figuring all this stuff out, so if I
haven't been in touch with you for a while, i'm sorry) as some
people may know, i was offered a job last march, full time summer, part
time school year, and full time upon graduation in may. well of
course, i was super excited, cuz it was job security and that's worth
more than it's weight in gold to a college senior (just ask). so
of course i jumped on board, who wouldn't? it seemed so obvious
and easy. i learned a lot about myself at my second stab at the
corporate world. #1. i hate desks. and sitting still
at them. i'm too restless, and really, really can't handle
sitting around all day looking at my computer screen, i thought i'd be
able to, but as per usual, i was wrong. #2. following the
passions and talents given to you by God is quite rewarding. I
haven't enjoyed doing what i've been doing for quite a while, until i
got back into my photography stuff at the end of the summer, and the
beginning of the school year. i love it so much. if the
world were perfect, i'd sooooo be on my way to a full-time photography
job right now. maybe down the road i will. right now
though, i just have to deal with the day to day challenge of keeping a
positive attitude about work (eventhough i don't like it). And,
yikes, that's a lot tougher to do than it is to say, believe me.
i think the line in the poem about grace growing most in winter but
that not being what i want applies quite directly to this whole
situation.
The other major realization that i had this summer didn't come from
work. it came from a number of conversations with friends about
some other aspects of life. the main one being relationships
(specifically with girls). as of late, things have been a bit
awkward due to the fact that it seems everyone that i am very close to
is either in a serious relationship, engaged, or married. and yet
i remain single. and up til this summer, i was quite unhappy
about that. but the more i've talked to people about it, and
thought about it, i've realized what a blessing it truly is. as
things stand right now, when i graduate, i will only be responsible for
myself. I don't have to worry about where my wife has a job, or
if she can get one where i'm headed. and to be quite honest this
fits into my dream of being a photographer quite well. i can go
on location, move to corporate headquarter cities, and not have to
worry about providing for someone other than myself (p.s. if
you're reading this mom, i promise to call lots if i end up moving far
away. it's not like i'll have a girlfriend i need to spend tons
of time on the phone with).
so i'm kind of in a transitional state of life right now. i stand
at a crossroads, and i believe that both will lead me to the same
place, but each path is quite different in it's own respect. each
with it's own set of challenges and struggles. and each with
separate rewards, but in the end the same reward.
| | |
|
